The Art of 'pick-up'​ - 6 Approaches F*uck-Boys Can Teach Marketers

Image from Google Images

Allow me to begin with wishing you a much better year ahead, dear reader. Let's start the year taking a leaf from the previous post in which we examined how marketers can help further the case for a more liberal and inclusive narrative around sexuality and sexual health. Today, let us see what a F*ck-boy or Casanova have to teach about consumer approaches.

I will narrate my eye witness account of one of the finer players in pick-up action. The following piece is based on true events. All resemblance to any person living and on the loose is real.

It all happened one cold winter evening when a friend’s ‘date’ from an app dropped by to say hello. The new person spent the evening deploying different strategies to make his play. He was one of the smoother players I had seen in action, or maybe because we have been in our Covid bubbles for so long. Nonetheless, his methods struck a chord with the marketer in me. So come, be a fly on the wall of this master-class in consumer targeting.  

Scoping the surrounding

Upon entering the room, he noticed the décor and tidiness of the place. For the rest of the evening he took over as DJ playing Bollywood's golden oldies and displaying serial killer OCD traits. Not bad for a right swipe, we thought.

Marketers too start with ‘consumer immersion’, or intelligence gathering about their consumers - their lives, motivations, fears, aspirations, environment... Businesses then make one of their tougher choices – of ‘who’ exactly to gun for. While instinctively businesses want to sell to everybody, it is essential to keep a target consumer in mind for a more focused approach. Much like how Casanova went after my friend.

Image from Google Images

Hit and try

This is when the subtle mastery came into play. I settled down with popcorn (mentally) to watch a man intent on scoring with a rather uninterested prospect – the chase probably only fuelled him. Thus began the master-class in wooing (customers).

1. Celebrity endorsement

Given the boy had recently moved to Delhi from Mumbai, he began building his credibility with juicy details of his celebrity conquests. Little unlikely if one were to judge a book by its cover, and not conviction.

Subtle message – if I am good enough for a celebrity, you should be lucky to get a part of me.

Marketing parallel – this is the easier route to building credibility. Typically used by new products to build confidence, or in more commoditised categories to catch eye-balls. We are no strangers to actors and sports stars endorsing everything from salt to automobiles. Would they actually use any of those products personally is anyone’s guess.

Obvious message – if the product is good enough for the celebrity, it’s definitely good, and good enough for you. Celebrities, and increasingly social influencers inspire public confidence. Influencers increasingly so as they come across as being more authentic and less sales oriented vs. celebrities. Then there is also the added celebrity association rub-off. Imagine eating the same healthy snack as an Indian cricketer!

2. Simply irresistible

First approach failing, Casanova quickly changed tactics to how his conversation, dancing and singing skills have won over even the coldest hearts – from both genders.

Subtle message – I manager to convert even my ‘haters’ with my intangible attributes - confidence, conversation skills, singing, humour.   

Marketing parallel – marketers too spend considerable time trying to understand what consumers like and dislike about their products vs. competition. They then try to go about trying to win them over by either highlighting their qualities or dispelling misconceptions. Occasionally they attack competition much like the Cola wars in the recent past. Winning over now has begun to include social posturing and demonstrating shared values with consumers.

Obvious message – give me a chance to change your mind. Not only am I better than you think, I will exceed expectations and ‘delight’ you vs. competition.

3. The talk-down

By now my friend’s eyes were rolling at the overconfident name dropper. Discouraged, but undefeated the player tried a radical tactic – the talk down.

We now heard and saw pictures of the ‘cheating ex’ who had put him off conventionally ’hot’ people. Incidentally, the main appeal of my friend – not being hot! All this while at my friend’s house, with an audience (me) - the nerve!

Not so subtle message – my ex was way hotter, why are you being so difficult. I have had better.

Marketing parallel – this is when brands make the consumers feel inadequate by playing on their insecurities and fears. These brands subtly shame consumers into trying a new product or switching brands. While we are familiar with people shaming housewives for not having clean toilet bowls and lacklustre washing, luxury brands tends to lead the pack. This segment has Machiavellian in manipulating consumers to derive self-worth derived from a label irrespective of utility, suitability, aesthetics or value.

Obvious message – the dire consequences of not using my product - from social embarrassment and inadequacy to personal shame. Consumer brands tend to use the tactic to galvanise consumers into action. Luxury brands ask consumers if they are worthy of their products. Psychology of rejection and shame makes people try even harder for acceptance.

4. Social sanction

Things were still going downhill for our suitor. I received a text asking me to not leave before the ‘smooth talker’. Little did I know the next shot would be fired from my shoulder! My polite smiles had been mistaken for approval.

Subtle message – I have passed the ‘friend test’. You should definitely consider giving me a chance.

Marketing parallel – the power of referrals and social media. Entire multi-level-marketing (MLM) brands have been built on the power of a trusted, personal referral. Social media signalling has spawned an entire industry of social media influencers. Personal referrals and signals of social acceptance are perhaps one of the oldest ways of gaining acceptability.   

Obvious message – your friend, or someone you trust has tried and approved of my product, it’s not just a manufacturer’s exaggerated claim. This is demonstrated when apps give incentives to refer downloads, or when taxi apps tell you how many people have ridden even during the pandemic.

5. The back-foot dance

By now Casanova realised he needed to tone things down a bit. In addition to the cheating ex, we heard of personal insecurities about his looks and having to resort to humour and charm (albeit a little late) to compensate.

Subtle message – I am a nice guy under all the bravado. A hurt puppy looking for a home.

Marketing parallel – this approach is becoming increasingly popular with brands. Authenticity and vulnerability humanize brands and connect at a deeper level with marketing savvy consumers. These traits that have become even more important since the pandemic hit. Kindness as a virtue is making a social comeback led by self-care and mental health conscious Millennials and GenZ.  

Earlier, brands and big corporations typically took the vulnerability route to handle PR disasters and image repair. However, their apologies and acknowledgement of any wrong doing typically come a little late and ring insincere.  

Obvious message – I may not be perfect, but I try to understand you and to deliver on your expectations. The new brands admit they are not the ‘know it all’ big guy, but the new kid - who is closer to the consumer, is listening, and has its heart in the right place. The product offers a genuine solution with good quality ingredients. The big corporates try to show their human side typically with stories of frontline workers, fair trade practices, and community projects.

6. The tease

Sensing a thaw, Casanova tried to push his luck further. He opened the picture gallery in his phone to show my friend memes, embarrassing pictures of drunken nights and forgettable moments. It was going well until the ‘oops’ pictures were ‘accidentally’ seen.

Subtle message – this is a trailer of what you will miss if you send me home tonight.

Marketing parallel – the famous demonstration advertising. We have all grown up seeing TV commercials showing the efficacy of washing powders, toothpastes and soaps. The efficacy is there for everyone to see, and for the non-buyers to miss out on.   

Obvious message – the clear pay-off. These are the product features and demonstrated benefit. Typically useful to showcase the ‘science’ or effectiveness of products in categories like daily essentials, cosmetics, and technology among others.

Curtain call

Unimpressed, my friend showed the rather enthusiastic suitor the door. While he left my friends eyeballs rolled-up in the sockets, I was seeing parallels with marketing approaches – 6 of them in all.

There was the celebrity endorsement route, then it was all about converting skeptics and rejecters. These were followed up by the shaming or talk-down which attacks a person’s sense of self-worth. Then there was the back-foot dance which exposes one’s own vulnerability and seems more authentic. Other ways were of social sanction and referral from trusted sources and finally the demonstration route.

While Casanova may have failed in his original mission, I hope his tenacity has proven to be a quick refresher for seasoned marketers, and helps entrepreneurs identify and choose more focused approaches with better hit-rates.